Meanwhile, Back At The Ranch…

…Texans happily elect the worst judge in America and a creepy-voiced fanatic who has already pledged to be yet another obstructionist jackass.

Rick Perry: Still A Piece of Shit (but with good hair)

It does not surprise me in the slightest that Perry has decided to further brutalize 1.2 million working poor Texans by “proudly” refusing expanded Medicare funds.  In fact, the only thing that surprises me is that he didn’t beat Bobby Jindal to the punch.  Still, it does add to an already fascinating speculation on just what, exactly, Perry has in place of a human soul:  bullshit?  Aqua Velva?  His secret collection of back-issue GQ?  The mind reels.

“I give THIS much of a shit about you working class peasant mo-fo’s”

The Numbers

There are nearly 22 million eligible Hispanic voters in America.  If Hispanics in Texas registered and turned out at the national average, to say nothing of, say, the California rate, Bill White would now be governor.  The fact that this is NOT happening represents a complete and utter failure on the part of the Texas Democratic Party.  Inexcusable.

Who Is Surprised By This?

Texas is dropping lunch on the weekends for prisoners.  Shocking?  Please!  Texas would use the rendered fat of prisoners for candles if not for Federal judges.

We’re Boned, Part 257 Of An Ongoing Series

Just in case you were wondering just how bad off YOUR local school district will be under Rick Perry and the Republican Sooper-Dooper Majority, you can look it up here.  Once again, thank you dedicated voters of Texas for putting this drooling gang of morons in charge of fixing the problem they created.  Good work, there.  Give yourselves a cookie.

All Hail the Mighty State

Leo Berman (R-Some Other Dimension) continues to fulfill his duties as the single biggest embarrassment in Texas politics, which is a hard accolade to achieve.  The only thing I can think of that MIGHT be better than introducing a bill because of something “I heard on the radio one day” would be to introduce a bill because “some dude on the internet posted a comment in RedState.”

Thanks for All the Votes, Suckers!

Is it humanly possible for Rick Perry to come across as more of a smug prick?  He knows that he can now say or do damn near anything–destroy education in this state, raise taxes while accepting a public tongue-bath from Grover Norquist, bite the heads off kittens on live television–because the majority of voters in Texas have clearly signaled they don’t give a rat’s ass about anything other than preventing illegal aliens from getting gay married under Sharia law and then having abortions.  So thanks, Texas voters!  Great job!

A Tale of Three Nitwits

The official State of the Union response by Paul Ryan, a disingenuous hack, and the unofficial Tea Partier by Michelle Bachman, a complete and utter loon who hates the troops.

Meanwhile, back in Texas, alleged Governor Rick Perry freely admits that he hates public schools, especially ones that serve brown people, and doesn’t think your kids are worthy of art, science, or college placement classes because they are only fit for manual labor.  If there’s a more smug, vicious, condescending prick in elective office anywhere, I haven’t met him yet.

This is the best the Republic Party has to offer.

We’re Screwed

Texas is TWENTY-SEVEN BILLION DOLLARS in the hole and the Official State Clown Car just pulled up to the Capitol to disgorge 101 Republicans, each one more ass-scratchin’ pig dumber than the last.  Meanwhile, our governor is the only person imaginable who makes George W. Bush look like an intellectual giant.  Plus, Bob Bullock (prime minister to Dubya as Queen of England) is dead.  By the end of the session, I expect the Legislature will collapse into anarchy and cannibalism and the entire state to be annexed by Venezuela.  Or sold to Halliburton.

Scenes from the Great Recession

1. Debt collection company uses fake deputies, judges and a fake courtroom to frighten money out of people;
2. The Supreme Court is poised to virtually wipe out class-action suits, one of the last legal tools left available to punish our corporate overlords;
3. Newly elected Republican Governors pledge to kill high-speed rail, thus wiping out hundreds of jobs;
4. Proving there’s no limit to his insanity, ego or cruelty, Alleged Governor Rick Perry now wants to secede from Medicaid to close the budget gap he pretended didn’t exist